Today has been very traumatic for me. Sitting talking to a friend who is dying.
Trying to be strong but not really being all that convincing. I know my mum died of cancer many years ago but somehow this is different. I don’t know why, it just is.
Ralf and I have been friends for god knows how long? Since 1961 when we joined the army together. I remember the guy who was the fittest and strongest of us all, a guy that was built like a brick shithouse. Now he sits there administering his own morphine looking yellow and no flesh left on his bones.
For days you've been lying there with your life apparently draining out.
your very being hanging in the balance while waging the final bout.
with the respirator your umbilical cord barely affording you life's breath.
while standing on the threshold between life and eternal rest.
So feebly I am writing with a broken heart which may never heal.
Because mere words are barely adequate to express how melancholy I feel.
Could it be your destiny,old mate,to come to such an untimely end.
Seems just yesterday we said hello and already it's time to say goodbye forever
my dear friend. Is this a new beginning or the unclimatic end?
The battle though fought with fervour is futile because the grim reaper will always win.
One day no matter how we try to prolong it,we'll all face that final bout.
I just wonder will I see you when my time clock runs out.
My heart is breaking, I cry at the thought of my friend dying at anytime now. It’s unbearable. I can write no more …
